Well, it’s that time of week agian, dear readers, where I pump out pages worth of filler content in order to temporary fill the empty void of my self-appreciation. Not like, it matters, of course, because to be fair I get more instagram likes then views per month, social media at its finest I assume.
As the title suggests, this is the second part of the second ski trip, (lets just pretend the first ski trip never happened, okay because god knows if I will ever be bothered with writing more unread nonsense). I must apologize ahead of time because the amount of effort placed into this post will be just as little as the last two posts. Of course this is for a good reason, as I have been, “Extremely Busy” (I.E. I’m a dirty procrastinator whose slowly collapsing work ethic has diminsed to a new low).
Nonetheless, I should likely stop insulting myself in order to distance my humor from that of Amy Schumer’s (dear god that Netflix Special), and move on to the actual content.
Todays plan was quite interesting compared to those before it. We had planned to check out a new mountain around the solitude area, Snowbird. However it is not as simple as it sounds as today was sunday, and I had school tomorrow. Adding to this complication was the fact that the lodge in which we were staying had it checkout time at 11am. So we decided to pack up everything besides ski clothes and one change of clothes in order to ski a full day and make it back on time for the plane flight.
After packing and loading up the car, we drove the short distance to Snowbird a mountain that is supposedly much larger then solitude. First impressions were good as they seemed to have a ton a traffic from boarders and skiers alike, and the tempature there was much lower then yesterday’s slush fest. We pulled into their quaint little breakfast place at the Snowbird Center, and like the montonmous cavemen we are, all got breakfast burritos. Now, due to my sheer incompatance (which is to be expected at this point honestly), I didnt take any photos. As a standin, enjoy this stock photo with the watermark left in, because theres no way that I could ever be dedicated enough to pay for this garbage.
Moving on, we grabbed our lift tickets and rentals agian and headed towards one of the two lifts from the snowbird center. While there was infact a tram to the top of the mountain, as to be expected on one as large as this, it was extremely inefficent. Unlike every other ski tram in existance, there only existed two cars on this tram, unlike the dozens of small gondolas usually present. The lift we chose instead took us to something we had been interested in before seeing it, the peruvian tunnel. Apparently around 20 years ago, some total dimwit thought it was worth 50 million dollars to bore a tunnel straight through one side of the mountain to the other in order to make it easier to get to the backcountry.
While it was interesting, and completely unique, it left me with many uncertainies. I havent got the faintest idea why in the world they decided to call it the peruvian tunnel, as there is no real influence of any culture on the tunnel, especially not that of peru, saying that im currently there right now. Another thing that confused me is why it was played off online as very interesting and informative, when all there was inside was some blurry framed photos and old mining equipment lying around, all of which you had no time to really understand as the magic carpet of the tunnel whipped you out the other end.
Once we emerged from the tunnel we encountered what must have been the main pull for snowbird, their backcountry. Just from the views alone you could tell it was gonna be great.
Or, as we soon found out, it turns out views alone meant nothing. Conditions, like in solitude, were still horrendous, just at the opposite end, as instead of turing into mashed potatos, the snow was always uncontrollable amounts of icy. It seemed the mountain cattered to a bunch of filty casuals as well, as it featured such great skiing classics such as countless unavoidable green catracks and mindnumbingly flat blues. Every run we did felt just okay as it seemed the only real appeals of this mountain was its countless double black chutes, all of which were roped off. As I soon realized, it felt as if the entire mountain was just a buildup to the actual run, like the flat run up right before your drop into a steep run. As the day went on, we all got increasingly pissed off looking a run that simply must not even exist. You would think there would be one fun run on this mountain, saying that its like three times the size of solitude, but alas you would be wrong. It seems solitude is such a great mountain because of its small side, as in order to make up for it all of its runs have to be the best they could possibly be, like a best of album of all the runs at a large mountain. We soon took a lift to the peak in order to see if the front side was any better, and to try to calm down with the help of a snack. Once agian, the views remained the only redeeming feature of the mountain.
Much to our dismay, the front side did not fuel our optimism as we had hoped. To the left mouguls, to the right catracks, to the center icy mouguly catracks. We had gotten so annoyed by this time that we decided to go find their only terrian park and just hang out their for the rest of the day, because they cant screw that up, right? Wrong. Another thing ive forgotten to mention is how flawed their entire mountain is when it comes to signs, as they seem to be almost nonexistanst, so unless you pull out a map every five seconds, you will never, and I mean never reach where you want to go. In our futile attempts to reach the terrain park we encountered mouguls and catracks, litterally the most cancerous objects created. Eventually we reached the terrain park, and did a few runs on it before we decided to call it a day and try to make it back to the main snowbirs center. As expected, if it was hard to get to the terrain park, it would be just as hard to get back. After following the single sign to a T, we rounded a corner and found ourselves at the base of a 200 foot hill, that we were expected to walk, because actual design sense seemed to bypass whoever created this snow covered pile of garbage.
After walking for a while, we returned to the center, repacked, changed, and headed off towards the airport, ready to get the heck out of there.
Now, our already late fight had gotten delayed, meaning we didnt take off till around 10:00 PM. Most people would be dismayed by this, but I was honestly glad, as it gave me time to finish up my history notes in the buisness lounge in the airport.
And now, I draw this post to a close, mainly because nothing else happened, and also because its like 12:30 and I want to be done with this.